Blah..

It has been an excellent weekend. We had an awesome time with the youth at Living Sacrifice, I got to spend time with my two oldest neices, which doesn't happen very often, and church today was awesome, between Pastor Wes' sermon and youth group tonight. So if everything went so well this weekend, why do I feel so blah? It's like I am almost sad, but I am not sad. I am just ehh. I don't get ehh very often. I guess maybe everything that is going on, plus some personal stuff, is starting to get to me. I put on a good front, or at least try. But lately, it feels like if anyone says the wrong thing at the wrong moment, I am going to start crying- and if you know me, I HATE crying. Passionately hate it. Especially in front of people. I think part of my problem lately is feeling like I don't belong. I feel like I am on the outside looking in, and trying to get in, but not quite making it. I also feel like everything is slipping away, and I don't know what is slipping away. Friendships, work things, church things. It feels like everything is slipping out of my hands. Maybe I just needed to write it down, and now I will feel better. Well, enough depressing thoughts for one night. Maybe I am just tired and need sleep. Hopefully that cures this mood.